Your partner probably won’t cheat on you or make you feel bad—but it’s important to ask yourself if they actually make you feel good.
They might even tell you that it’s okay if you want to date other people, even when you’ve made it clear you want to be exclusive.
If you’ve brought this up before, you might notice that your partner changes their ways for a little while, but then eventually returns to their old habits.
For instance, maybe you tell your partner that for your birthday, you’d really like a bouquet of flowers. When your birthday comes around, they’ll say that they “forgot” or didn’t get to it in time.
Try not to assume what your partner means when they tell you things. If you aren’t 100% clear on what’s being said or asked of you, clarify it with your partner. Say something like, “So I’m hearing you say…” or, “Could you explain what you meant by that?”
If you two are just casually dating, it’s even more important to talk about what that means for both of you. Does “casual” mean that it’s okay to date other people, or is it a monogamous relationship without the labels?
For instance, an example of disrespect in a relationship might be flirting with other people. Even though you’re “technically” not cheating, it’s still not very respectful to flirt with others while in a relationship.
If you and your partner don’t have a solid foundation of trust in the relationship, consider going to couple’s counseling. Trust can be hard to re-establish once it’s gone, and a professional can help.
A partner who wants to hang out with you all the time is showing controlling behavior, which can lead to abusive tendencies down the line.
It’s important to talk about the frequency of sex throughout the week, too. People’s libidos are different, and you may have to compromise with your partner about how often you two have sex.
If you feel unsafe in a relationship, it’s possible that the relationship is abusive. If that’s the case, make a plan to leave the relationship right away.
“I’d really appreciate it if you put more effort into planning dates for us. It really makes me feel good when you take me out, and it makes me happy to see that you put thought into an outing. ” “Hey, could we talk? I wanted to see if we could chat about where this relationship is going. We don’t have to label anything yet, but I need to know if this is serious or if we’re still just casually dating. ”
“When I come home to a bouquet of flowers, it makes me feel really good. I’d like to feel that way more often. ” “When we don’t go out on actual dates, I feel a little bit neglected. ”
“This isn’t easy for me to say, because I really like how our relationship is going. I just think there needs to be some changes if we’re going to do this long-term. ” “I know you’ve been totally honest with me, so I want to be totally honest with you. ”